Tuesday, February 16, 2016

Men I've met

Disclaimer: At the outset I would like to state that this post is extremely biased, written from the point of view of the people have met, opinions can differ, there is no right or wrong. You can agree with me or present your viewpoint and experiences.

In the twenty-three years of my existence, I have been exposed to a variety of men - well, not quite literally, but you get what I mean. This is an amalgamation of all that I have seen from personal experience, by observing people and after listening to woe stories from my girl pals. So ladies and gentlemen (oops, not for children), here's Yours Truly presenting to you, the different types of men.


Daddy's David:
This guy has all the luxury in the world, lives on the father's money and cribs about how his dad 'sometimes' does not give him enough cash to, hold on guys, party. David is pampered, spoiled and extremely superficial. He owns a credit card, a debit card, drives his dad's second or third car and literally blows all his money out and asks his dad for more. He knows how to impress girls - bouquets, fancy dinner dates, expensive gifts and sometimes random road trips to places where his girlfriend will upload 'sun-kissed' selfies. He convinces everyone around him to believe that he is the most prized possession and deserves to be showered with only the best. Guilty, who? No, I deserve this. Well, he is selfish as hell. His interests are mostly up-scale and rarely long-lasting. Unfortunately, so are his relationships.  

Self-made Sam: 
Sam is self-sufficient, spends cautiously but generously, has fun and brings out the reaction that every situation demands of him. Sam is responsible and extremely determined. He earns the tag of being the Best Employee at work, Ideal Son at home and the Perfect Boyfriend in a relationship. Sam lives for others - sometimes he is adventurous but is mostly very serious. Sam believes in culture and values. He would do anything to make others happy, even if that makes him miserable from the inside. He doesn't take risks and looks out for a 'settled and comfortable' life. His vacations are planned three months in advance and will never cancel one thing for the other. Indian parents go looking out for a Sam for their daughters, unfortunately.

Stingy Steven:
Steven is smart, Steven likes to save money but Steven is stingy to such an extent that he will be completely fine living a miserable life despite having all the money. Steven doesn't spend on food, rarely shops (read shabby clothes), counts every penny he has loaned and almost always never pays for the bill (I forgot my wallet, could you pay this time please?). The most he could do is split it. And he goes all guns blazing for free food and drinks. Steven even judges you by the amount of money you spend and secretly wishes he could too. Stinginess is a disease, it really is. 

Broke Bob:
Bob is forever broke, borrows money from you and hardly ever thinks of returning it. Bob cancels out on plans because his money is never enough, travels in second class and insists on taking a lunch box every time he goes out and yearns for money he could have had - you can't really blame him, he is just poor. He's emotionally fragile and ends up blaming the Universe for what he doesn't have and takes no effort whatsoever to alter his situation - maybe we should rechristen him 'Lazy and Broke Bob' . 

Show-off Sheldon: 
Sheldon is smart, self-sufficient, earns well and spends generously. He is very lovable and fun loving, adventurous and outgoing. But there is a small glitch - he does and overdoes all of it and to top it all, shows off. He discusses in detail about the amount of money he spends - his international trip plans, bank balance, the latest car or mobile phone he plans to buy, casually flashes his Mont Blanc Limited Edition Masterpiece pen while signing in a restaurant and exclaims how a piece of land in Maldives will be a good idea for a farmhouse or how he is planning to open up forty yoga studios in one of the metro cities in India. Incorrigible Sheldon's show-off skills work well to spread publicity but is absolutely unnecessary otherwise and brings nothing but embarrassment to the women with him.  

That's all from me, folks. 

3 comments:

  1. Good collection of VARIETIES! I have ALSO met Daddy's Darling, Self-made Sandya, Stingy Stella, Broke Banu, Show-off Shakti and more. LOL.

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  2. Excellent one! Getting better very very quickly

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  3. Uma Mahi, Haha,yes. I agree too. And Vivek, thank you so much :)

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